Category Archives: Real News

Happy Thanksgiving From Sarah Palin

Sarah Palin Turkey Slaughter

From Thanksgiving Last Year:

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David Hasselhoff Sings at the Fall of the Berlin Wall

I couldn’t resist posting this great video of David Hasselhoff singing at the fall of the Berlin Wall, and here’s a picture as well. David Hasselhoff is inherently funny.

David Hasselhoff Berlin Wall


Find more videos like this on HoffSpace

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Berlin Wall Fell 20 Years Ago Today

Today is the 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall, which marked the end of the cold war. A little known fact is that when US President Ronald Reagan made the famous statement, “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!” the wall wasn’t actually torn down then. President Reagan made that statement as part of a larger speech on June 12, 1987. It wasn’t until two-and-a-half years later on November 9, 1989 that the wall was actually torn down.

Berlin Wall Falls Win

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The Christmas Sweater: A Picture Book by Glenn Beck

You may or may not be aware (I wasn’t until moments ago) that Glenn Beck wrote a novel called The Christmas Sweater.

Glenn Beck The Christmas Sweater Childrens BookOf course, you can now allow Glenn Beck to influence your children as well.  Just released is The Christmas Sweater: A Picture Book.  Give your kids a head start on mindless following learning with this literary and artistic masterpiece!

 

Financial Disclosure

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Pecora Flooring Calls President Obama a Lyin’ African

Pecora Flooring’s phone number is 412-825-3780, and their website is http://www.pecoraflooring.com/. I’m just sayin’. Thanks to Pittsburgh Channel 11 WPXI and Jasiri X.
Sign Calls President Obama a Lyin' African

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House of Representatives Passes Health Care Reform

Tonight, the House of Representatives passed comprehensive health care reform by a vote of 220 to 215.  Read more of our coverage here.

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Utah Teens Cited for Rapping Order at McDonald’s

A few days ago a group of teenagers pulled up to McDonalds and rapped their order. They were inspired by a video on YouTube where some other youngsters did the same thing. The McDonald’s employees called the police, as if rapping your order is a crime, and the police cited the teens with disorderly conduct. (I have no idea why.) Some friends of mine and I once sang an order at a fast food place, White Castle if memory serves. I’m glad I don’t have a record because of it.

Hat tip to The Moderate Voice and The Young Turks.And here’s the original video that served as the teens’ inspiriation. It’s a bit long, but if you watch the first 30 seconds or so, you’ll get the point.

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Drunk Driver Calls 911 on Herself

Woman: Somebody’s really drunk driving down Granton Road…
Dispatcher: Okay, are you behind them or…
Woman: No, I am them.

Yes, it’s true, a Mary Strey called 911 to report a drunk driver. She then proceeded to tell the dispatcher that she was the one who was drunk.

As Jeff Foxworthy said, “True stuff is the funniest stuff.”

If you’d like to caption Ms. Strey’s mugshot, you can do so here.

Transcript:
Dispatcher: 911
Woman:Somebody’s really drunk driving down Granton Road.
Dispatcher: Which way are they going?
Woman:They are going, um…
Dispatcher: Towards Granton or towards Gailsville
Woman:Towards Granton
Dispatcher: Okay, are you behind them or…
Woman:No, I am them.
Dispatcher: You am them?
Woman:Yes, I am them?
Dispatcher: Okay, so you want to call and report that you’re driving drunk?
Woman:Yes
Dispatcher: Okay, what’s your name?
Woman: Mary
Dispatcher: Okay, hold on one second, Mary, okay?
Woman:Okay
Dispatcher: Are you still driving right now?
Woman:Yes
Dispatcher: Do you want to stop driving before you get in an accident?
Woman:Yes, I will stop.
Dispatcher: Okay, are you going to stop right now?
Woman:Okay, I’m stopping.
Dispatcher: Okay, just hang on the phone, okay? What’s your last name, Mary?
Woman:Strey
Dispatcher: Are you stopped right now?
Woman:Yes I am.
Dispatcher: What kind of vehicle do you have, Mary?
Woman:I have a Saturn. Can I take my seatbelt off?
Dispatcher: If you’re stopped.
Woman:Yes, I’m stopped.
Dispatcher: If you’re stopped, that’s fine, yeah.
Woman:I’m in park.
Dispatcher: Okay
Woman:Can I take my seatbelt off?
Dispatcher: Yeah, as long as you’re not driving, as long as you’re not moving.
Woman:Can I turn my car off and just turn the flashers on.
Dispatcher: Yep, that’s fine if you want to turn it off and turn the flashers on, so then we can find you. Okay, just hold on one second again, Mary.

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Swine Flu, Space Hotels, and the Finger

I’ve decided to start a new feature called “Real News.”  While we’re a place for satire, parody, just flat out fake news, sometimes the true stuff is hilarious.  So, we’ll be on the lookout for real news stories that are funny, odd, or flat out weird.  If you hear of any stories that you think fit this description (or if you have any other content that you think should appear on PoliticLOLz) e-mail it to .

So, to kick us off here’s some real news.

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